LEARNING IN THE SILENCE – RHONDA BOWEN

LEARNING IN THE SILENCE – RHONDA BOWEN

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I have always had this deep and sometimes paralyzing need to write something deep and meaningful. I occasionally write for an online Christian magazine, and when I have a deadline coming up it can get intense. I am currently going through one of these intense periods. I have been torturing myself mentally all week trying and waiting for God to give me that something profound that would make a reader stop and think while she’s standing in line at the supermarket cashier or sitting on the subway on the way home.

But I came up with nothing. God gave me nothing.

And I know that’s almost a blasphemous statement to make but it’s the way I have been feeling for a while; like I am calling out to God for an answer and I’m getting nothing.

Lord is this job you gave me really what you want me to be doing with my life? And if so, why is it that I feel such a strong pull to something else?

Nothing.

Lord, do you want me to quit and go work overseas?

Nothing.

How about a full-time writer? I always enjoyed doing that.

Still nothing.

Events?

Zip. Nada. Zilch.

The silence is almost deafening. At least it seems that way to me. Especially when I hear other people talk about how God speaks to them. How they hear a voice telling them what to do. Really? You hear voices? Maybe you should get that checked out.

 

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